**This is part of a new, irregular series on ADHD and other kinds of neurodiversity in the academy - I am not a medical doctor nor am I a therapist or mental health practitioner and this is not medical advice. It is PhD advice though!**
"Just schedule it!"
"Make a time for it and just do it then!"
"Put it on your to do list so you don't forget!"
"Once you get into a routine it'll be second nature"
The above is all very helpful advice if you're trying to deal an increasing amount of work, due at irregular intervals, and often not at all urgent until it is overdue and very urgent. But if your brain is divided into two times - now, and not now - then a lot of that advice is counterintuitive at best, and shame-y and hurtful at worst!
A lot of us see time in this way to some extent - there is what I'm doing right now, and then there's a sense that there will be time after this to do other things. But if you are neurodiverse, and specifically if you have some degree of executive dysfunction, then it isn't so much that you don't understand the idea of "later" as an important time intellectually, it's that it doesn't feel pressing or urgent, and therefore, it is really, really hard to get yourself to focus on it, plan for it, or invest in it, because now will always get first rights on your attention.
But no one is doomed to a present-only existence, like a goldfish putting out fires. Here are two areas you can experiment with to see if there are ways to help yourself better structure your now, and make your not now a little more concrete.
Capture the not-now tasks before they float away. This one is easier said than done, but I have seen a few different systems work really well for capturing that fleeting "oh I should do that" thought you might have during another activity, and put it somewhere where you can access it again, in a different "now".
It's messy, but post it notes, notebooks, or jot pads work really well for this. Think about something to do, jot it down, keep going. The trick is making sure you process all that data at some point - maybe you specifically use post it notes, and as part of the "cleaning" process you put them in a task manager. Or you use something like a bullet journal, which is essentially (at its most simple form) a running to do list that has different symbols for now tasks, and not now tasks.
Task managers like ToDoist or ClickUp will let you schedule tasks in the future, or set them to recur at a regular interval so you don't have to keep setting up the tasks. The trick I find is to keep the system as simple as humanly possible - many task managers have lots of extra features, but if you need to tag, sort, estimate time, etc for every task, you won't necessarily want to do that.
Use your phone to help. I have decided that my bargain with the Devil is to use Google Home so that I can shout reminders in the kitchen and have them sync to my Google Calendar. But lots of phones have a "speak to remind" function - and lots of us have our phones nearby!
Reset your now. If it were as easy as setting reminders, we wouldn't be having this conversation! But when we are in flow/hyperfocus, it's really hard to interrupt that - and when you do, it can cause some irritation and frustration, too. But there are ways to sync up so that the rollover into now can occur a little more frequently.
Alarm clocks - in your phone or often, separate physical objects work even better - can be really useful. One that goes off every two hours can be a cue to check back in and see if there are things you can/want to switch to. Tying that to an alarm/time of day, rather than the "oh @#*(@&# I'm late" or an email reminding you that something is due can be really useful in interrupting the shame loop that comes with new/urgent tasks.
A steady (as "no matter when it happens as long you can get it into the schedule") meeting with yourself on a regular basis. In the morning when you start to work can be a good time, or every time you sit at your desk, or even every Monday/Sunday with your whole family can work. This is a chance to look ahead, refamiliarize yourself with what's coming, get support if you need it, and basically, move things purposefully into the "now" time. The routine is helpful, the overview is helpful, and if you can do it on a time-based basis rather than an need-based (ie, things are late and you're overwhelmed) it can feel less like a punishment.
Use email to your advantage. Now that gmail has integrated a "send later" feature and a "snooze" feature to have things return to the top of your inbox, it is a lot easier to have important things show up in your email when you want/need to see them. This technique works best if you aren't an email avoider (no shame! just know yourself!), and if your inbox is relatively clear, but it can be a game changer if you basically use your inbox as a to-do list manager anyway. This saves you the step of having to turn things into recurring tasks and leans in to the way you use email already.
But in either zone, the overall goal is to take the now/not now distinction and have it be something you more consciously play with, rather than something that sneaks up on you. The more you can control how and when information comes into your field of view, the less the "oh I have to do this" feeling will be automatically linked with the "oh man I missed it / I messed up / this is late" cycle, and more with the "oh yes, now it's time for that" feeling. Elaborate schedules and complex systems of time blocking don't work for everyone, so lean into what does work for you, and make your now happen a little bit more on your terms.